Posted by: shekinahp | February 11, 2010

Grant and Jane Clarke and their control over Life and Death Part I


  1. Those stories are so sad.
    It was NOT your choice to behave that way, it was not YOUR responsibility.

    They taught us not to BLAME others, because by pointing the finger at somebody we were ultimately pointing at God with our thumb. Well, that’s BS.

    Jane Clarke, Gregg Hake and Grant Clarke need to be blamed for what they did to you, to those wonderful people, to us.
    I’m glad we are out of that cult now, and I feel for those who think it is their choice to stay at Deerfield in Dahlonega GA, or to even join other cults. So much spiritual and emotional damage!

  2. Grant had cancer.

    • *has

  3. Wow…. Kudos to the person who has put up this blog!

    Reading the above was hard to do, I truly ended up getting very emotional just reading that.
    I could relate in some ways to it.

    I was not in the deerfield group, but I was in a bible cult & I heard the same shit, especially about people who had the courage to walk away from the abuse. Those who did walk away had all sorts of abusive bible verses hurled at them…”not worthy of the kingdom…God’s fiery indignation & wrath to devour the enemy”…of course “the enemy” according to the leader’s pronouncements would be anyone who would dare to leave the group.
    I should know, I was one who did leave.
    I was excommunicated, a whole sermon rant dedicated to my husband & I, the “church discipline” sermon….we have been shunned & slandered from the bully pulpit.

    Some day I hope these leaders are shown for exactly what they are, controlling & abusive in god’s name, using the bible to condemn anyone who would dare to speak out or have a differing interpretation or view point.

    I get mad when I think of these friggen controllers who call themselves “men of God” & how they utterly damage people’s lives.

    I hope others eventually have the courage to continue to speak out , these mother f*ckers need to be shown for what they are.

    Just my opinion based on my experiences.

    I’ll be checking it out here…

    • See if you can find others that wised up and got out like you did. Cults thrive on the concept of divide and conquer. In an older world where people were not able to communicate as quickly as we can today, the division was much simpler. In today’s technological world, it is more difficult to keep everybody contained. It will only get even tougher.

      Do not back down. Find others to have strength in numbers and get back that which was taken from you.

      • Anything is possible….. 🙂 😉

  4. One other factor is that I wanted an Energetix protocol to help Laurita have a better life during her chemo. They always told us that we better don’t do anything, that we were going to be blamed by the family.
    We believed that wholeheartedly.

    • There are so many levels of wrongness at this point, it’s difficult to know which post to respond to first…Life, Death, Sex, Money and Financial Misappropriation, Tax Fraud, Violation of Children, Manipulation, Thought Reform, Abuse of Power: Spiritual, Mental and Physical…
      I can’t help but wonder where we go from here. Is there life after MST? Can we rebuild our personal lives and let go of the pain? Or are we eternally caught in a vortex of retribution and revenge? Trying to tell enough of our story to prove our point….Truth is-We will never get back what was lost.
      Don’t get me wrong,
      I would wish that this blog would be able to educate ourselves and others enough to stop these people from further abuse and manipulation, but then what? Will they stop? Or just crank it up somewhere else- like Canada or San Francisco perhaps? Did you ever know a sociopath to say they’re sorry and just quit?
      I suspect that as damning as this blog is, many of us could share SO MUCH MORE than we have thus far- we are holding back, probably due to fear and vulnerability.
      I appreciate Shekinah and Exmstmember for what you have shared. I’m not turning away from the truth, just wondering of there is something beyond this- some way to turn back to the light instead of wandering in the dark shadows – something to inspire HOPE.
      My heart still hurts – shards of glass under my skin – even years later. I am trying to move on, but the pain is still too real and I feel for all of you former members out there- You were once my family.. we cared so much for each other…where are you all now, I wonder.
      As for me personally, I am “making it” – just barely; financially OK now, but damaged…
      I read this blog numerous times daily and it’s like staring at a wreck on the side of the road. you don’t want to see it but you can’t stop looking …much like watching “Lost”!!!! at least that story is ending this season-(so they say) I feel like one of the characters stuck on that island- wondering why I ended up here, and how to get back home….
      I left, but I really never “left” – do you know what I mean?

      • hi hmmmmm,
        You raise many good questions and I want to share my experience on just one of the topics you raised. When I began to have doubts and questions, one of my friends, an ex Emissary, told me to read the website written by 2 ex Emissaries in 1993. I did. It opened the window. It helped me see the light and encouraged me to walk away. This is to say that this blog will be available for years for others with questions about MST and others experience. We may all have moved on but this place where we shared out truth will remain and be of great service.

  5. I was not in your cult totally, but I was in Deerfield for two months and my best friend was living there.
    I’m reading your stories and I feel a little sad. I had good luck and I didn’t enter to the group as you. It was because I like to analyze all and I didn’t have enough confidence in Grant and Jane. I must say that I loved the classes and the intentions most people who lived there had. I think that in the end, you have to rescue all that knowledge that you learned there, because some of it are very useful for life and were extracted from budism, hinduism, anthropology, history,psychology,etc. All of us always have the right to choose whatever fits to us, so if you lived there for some time, it was your decision. And you have to think that some of the things they said resounded in you and perhaps take of that what is useful to you now.
    Personally, I left the cult because Grant told me that If I left Deerfield all my life would be wasted. As they “teach” us that we do not have to do or start anything with fear I applied what they taught me. If I stayed, I would do that because of the fear of wasting my life, so I decided to do what they taught me in their classes: Do not start anything because of fear and I left them.

    • You were very smart Shikasta, applying the principles we learned right away!
      You are also right in pointing the fact that all these principles are coming from everywhere, hinduism, humanism, budism, philosophy, common sense, etc, not from Grant and Jane Clarke and Gregg Hake, they used them and keep using them as instruments of manipulation and control.

      One of those principles that is unfolding in front of us right now:

      “Hurt no one so that no one may hurt you.”

      “Just as pain is not agreeable to you, it is so with others. Knowing this principle of equality treat other with respect and compassion.”

      “Do not to your neighbor what you would take ill from him.”

      “Do not do to others what would anger you if done to you by others.”

      So the Clarkes and Gregg Hake are just reaping what they sow, as simple as that.

    • You are right. We made a decision to live there. We also made a decision to donate money to an organization under the premise that the money would be used for that organization (we thought a chapel would be built, for example). We never knew that it was to be used for supporting causes such as expensive clothes and fashion.

      What happened to your best friend? Did he/she get out or stay? Is that friend still there or did that person get to walk out on his/her own terms?

    • Shikasta you were so smart. You took advantage of what was provided to you and ran as fast as you could shen they wanted to put the leash on. Thanks God you have a free spirit and always had critical thinking. You received the love bombing of all those people at the cult, specially those at the lodge, and when it was time for you to pay back with your freedom you left. Many of us were surrounded with the cult tactics of love bombing and thought we “owed to the Lord”. The price for that was our freedom.

  6. I liked to share my story, because I applied something that they were teaching us in order to understand what was going on. The point is that some of the things they said to us can help in some situations.

  7. […] the truth of his past as treasurer of MST Inc and Deerfield leader, along with Grant Clarke and Jane Clarke. Gregg Hake blog is an effort to cover his past as MST Inc treasurer. Here is Gregg talking about […]

  8. I’ve known Grant Clarke since high school, in London, Ontario in the early 1960’s. We discovered The Emissaries together in the late 1960’s at the University of Western Ontario, via the Emissary Ontology Club, off campus. Following ongoing correspondence with Martin Exeter, in 1971 I moved to Richmond, BC to join Grant in an Emissary communal home, and in 1972 moved to 100 Mile Lodge, the Emissary HQ in Canada, home of Lord Martin Exeter. I left as cultish hell broke loose in the late 1980’s and early 1990’s.

    I have read many of your stories posted on this blog with the compassion of one who has emerged, yet alive and well, from similar circumstances a few years earlier. I chose to distance myself from Grant easily 25 years ago, as I found he claimed to know far too much about what others should do with their lives.

    As I sit here on a friend’s farm in coastal British Columbia finishing a revision of my ebook The Cosmic Alarm Clock which includes brief mention of Grant, I thought I’d try a Google search to see what might come up about him. Your blog stands as a sad, but to me not surprising, tribute to qualities I long ago observed in him.

    FYI I yet find resonance with much of the vision expressed by Uranda and Aumra (Martin Exeter).I’m hopeful this isn’t simply optimistic delusion, based on wanting to make sense of life, particularly my own, and to see some emerging sense of progression, development, and awakening to spiritual connection through my lifetime. I, in fact, find considerable continuing confirmation via various serendipitous bits and pieces which appear in my life. I suspect this is true for all of us as we continue to pay attention, and discover what we apparently must from such train wrecks as this blog outlines.

    This time now is, I trust, the dawn of the next Golden Age, not lockdown of Prison Planet Earth, and these painful experiences we have serve to deepen our compassion for ourselves, for our fellows, for the entire human and global condition. Ultimately I’ve found I must include in my compassion even such characters as Grant, Jane, Rob and others who seem to think their success can only be found through the manipulation and deception of others.

    I wish you all the best as we accelerate into the large scale changes ahead through 2011, 2012 and beyond.


    David Thatcher

  9. …wonder what happened to The White Witch… it’s hard sometimes to speak your truth…but it’s crucial that we not capitulate- victory is near.

  10. Hi Learning to Think, The White Witch is still here. There is still some grief process to work through. Reading this blog touches me deeply and writing in it is sometimes a little difficult because there is a certain pain in revealing the hurt one has sustained through trusting and loving others who were false. I am still here, dear one.

  11. I wonder what really happened to Shirley and Betty. Does anybody know if their deaths were investigated?

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